There are times when you make love to the keyboard and then there are times when you just punch keys. Today seems to be the latter.
Oh My God, though. I have a load inside my head, it’s like a diarrhea of thoughts (excuse the analogy!) dying to be poured on paper but then, everything wants to come out at the same time.
Breathe, my dear thoughts. You need to be channelized.
Agenda of the day, everyday: Amaze yourself. I did yesterday. I had a moment when I felt proud of myself..I also had a moment when I pissed myself off. But then, that keeps happening, me and my alter ego have this special relationship. Murderous….one of us has to go. Or maybe we can find a way to live together. Only if the one who lives outside my body can deal with her.
I must name her something..I keep bringing her up, she is showing up very often too. What do we call her? The child that she is… I love her. I would call her Lover.
I was having a quick chat with my close friend on WhatsApp. Yah, unfortunately that is where we get together because we don’t have the luxury to see each other in school every second day anymore.. but then, if I look back – we weren’t really close when we met each other 5 days of the week. It was only after going separate ways for a few years that we got close. How strange.
She was encouraging me to do something that I have barely even thought about, not even dreamt about – because 1) I underestimate myself, 2) I am directionless, 3) I like being lost
But I have aspirations close to what she suggested and I have vague dreams about seeing myself doing something like that. She also shared a very nice video on the Law of Attraction. Now I am a big believer in that since more than an year now and that is how I brought a lot of changes in my life. But a few months back, I deviated from the track and got lost again.
Off late though, I have noticed how I am getting to see, read, come across all the things that I seriously need to inculcate. It’s like the universe helping me out because – trust me, what you seek is seeking you. And I have been seeking help – if not out loud but deep within, talking to myself, looking for answers, looking for a way – a hint, a sign, a direction to walk into.
And I feel…..I kind of see a light….
Exactly how I did, last year.
The hazy scene is sort of taking a shape of an idea that will come into a life form soon.
Oh, in other news, this one’s finally getting over. Phew! What a long read it was. One word – BORING. No depth in the story.. just sex. But I can’t leave a book half-read. Obviously. So yeah, it’s almost over and I have a few lined up to read & this time, I will be quicker. Because as someone said, there are too many nice books out there to waste your time on trashy ones.
It’s not easy, dealing with the monotony. We all have our favorite ‘things to do’. It could be reading, it could be driving long distances… it could be listening to that one favorite track everyday and dancing to it, cooking, work out, shopping (whynot) .. sketching .. doodling .. singing .. photography… playing the guitar…Basically, things that you do and enjoy your own company. YOUR THINGS. YOUR TIME. YOU.
Must – never – stop – doing – what – we – love
I have been ignoring my favorites. And you know, when you do that.. over a period of time, you start being so frikkin dull – dull to be around yourself, dull to be around others. Never lose your essence. So what’s your essence? I am noting down mine, I have quite a few. Starting tomorrow (because today is already half gone!), I am going to make sure these things are a part of my 24 hours.. most of them, if not all.
Don’t you feel 24 hours are too less, that life is too short to enjoy it to the fullest. And time just passes, while we ignore so many things that we could be doing. What’s on my mind? Wait I will show you what exactly ..
Oh. This is just so dreamy and something I HAVE TO HAVE TO HAVE TO DO! I am sending this image to my fiancé right away. Well, I will not do it in the bridal outfit but definitely a month after the wedding, suuure! This is G O A L S.
Back to the daily doses. I have a few things that make me feel calmer, more in touch with myself and happier each time I do them. I will be talking about them in another post..as they keep popping up.
In no order of preference, writing is one thing that I absolutely enjoy doing. And WordPress gives me a nice platform to do that, I quite like it. I don’t have many/hardly any readers as of now, but then, it’s a blessing in disguise too because I write like no one’s reading! haha
So. I must do it, if not daily, then every second day. But considering my skyrocketing emotional levels these days – I might just park my ass here. 🙂
Ooh, I saw two lovely movies yesterday and today. Talk about them tomorrow.