kya kabhi savera laata hai andhera?
There are times when you make love to the keyboard and then there are times when you just punch keys. Today seems to be the latter.
Oh My God, though. I have a load inside my head, it’s like a diarrhea of thoughts (excuse the analogy!) dying to be poured on paper but then, everything wants to come out at the same time.
Breathe, my dear thoughts. You need to be channelized.
Agenda of the day, everyday: Amaze yourself. I did yesterday. I had a moment when I felt proud of myself..I also had a moment when I pissed myself off. But then, that keeps happening, me and my alter ego have this special relationship. Murderous….one of us has to go. Or maybe we can find a way to live together. Only if the one who lives outside my body can deal with her.
I must name her something..I keep bringing her up, she is showing up very often too. What do we call her? The child that she is… I love her. I would call her Lover.
Welcome Lover. We can talk here.
Everything is mostly amazing. You have so much! A lot that a lot of people only wish for, can only dream about. You have been gifted that…
Because you deserve it. Either destined or you worked for it, waited for it – but you deserve it.
Why am I suddenly uncomfortable?
So uncomfortable I want to break something.
Ok. I know what it is. My phone’s fucked. It’s way too irritating !!!!!!!!!!!!!
When I cook.
So, this happened today.
I am in awe of people who are good in kitchen. Well, I am not that bad but then, I am new there – so I won’t discredit myself either.
A lot of people would agree with me – cooking is therapy. It works like magic. That explains the title. The colors, the smell, the sounds. The way these ingredients mix and turn into something so appealing to your taste buds. Mmmmm….
Sourcing the ingredients, getting them ready, chopping and mixing, creating something yummy and presenting it is not the entire thing though. The icing on the cake is when someone you love eats it and takes another portion..
Simple joys of life.
Let’s cook with love…more often!
It’s a weekend of birthday parties for me. Friday was a baby’s first and the theme was blue. As soon as someone invites you to a party with a theme, you mentally scan your entire wardrobe in a flash of a second and come to the conclusion that you have no clothes because the dresses in blue are hanging in the “will wear when i lose some weight’ corner. Life officially sucks. I am not a very “let’s dress up / what’s my OOTD??” kind of a person anyway. But wait a second, dig deeper, something definitely comes to the rescue. And it’s nice to make an effort sometimes. Now, blue is pretty darn easy! But when it comes to me – I have an issue with something on any given day. Yesterday, the issue (just as common as the theme) was weight 😀 But we managed. Me and my 59.5 kgs (as checked this morning, it was 60.5 last week, so I am happy anyway. The target is me being pretty fuckin ambitious but whatever – you can do anything and all that jazz.)
Let me share what I wore.
Someone loved it too *winkwink*
Please leave a comment and let me know what you think?? :*
Hold on tight to that person who gives you the feeling of being at home. I got lucky and met someone just like that. I call him my best friend, someone I laugh with, show my tears to, well – you can say I am unguarded when he is around and that is my freedom. I do act beyond stupid all the time and he is crazy enough to appreciate that and love me more for all the madness. There are times when we get a little serious and talk about life and somehow he brings a funny twist to the conversation and I just wonder how he does that so easily. There are times I scream at him, am rude beyond belief and throw tantrums – he pauses for a second, looks at me, gives me a look… and cracks a joke or breaks into a dance – right in the middle of the road.
I can’t help but laugh.
I feel… God has his amazing ways. I know he is making up to me.
I know what you’re doing God. Thank you!!! When I was crying, I never asked you why. I knew it. I knew there was a reason. This is the reason…
I said what I wanted. I am sure we don’t need it right now. But I said what I wanted. And I am happy that I want it.
That time of the week when I need to get away. Yeah, it happens once every week, either closer to the weekend or after it.
What is it that I am looking for? The eternal quest for that something … I can’t put a finger on.
For now, I don’t want to know what’s happening in the lives of all these people (close, not so close, acquaintances and strangers) so I have extracted myself out of all these spaces like Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat & Instagram. Starting today, I am reconnecting with the self, maybe that’s what’s missing. I tried it earlier but failed…no shame. I have neglected myself, no shame. But now, knowing that it’s harming my very essence, if I still neglect the problem – it’s all my fault.
I am glad I have the gift of expression through the medium of the written word. Exploring .. happily. This feels good. It does feel good!
I am going to check out a hotel where my parents are planning to get me and my love married to each other. Eeeeeee. Yes, bride to be. I have all things wedding on my head and a few more….
Next post : A few photos from my weekend trip to Kasauli in Himachal Pradesh, India.